Relationships are a big part of a person’s life. It is because of the influence of people that we become who we are. Can you imagine how your life would be like if you had never created a bond with anyone? For starters, you wouldn’t even be able to live in a society.
People, and your relationships with them, are the essential thing that fosters your development. The right friends, the right lover, will help you grow, get in touch with yourself and allow you to have a safe, loving environment while all of this happens.
Yet, we aren’t always surrounded by people who support us, credit us and value us. Sometimes, we find people around us do the opposite of that.
It seems it has become very difficult to meet people we can trust, that foster our growth and that are willing to grow by our side. In fact, it is much easier to find people who make us feel guilty, oppressed, undermined, controlled and mocked. And, I don’t know about you, but I hate feeling that way.
Relationships, and people, are supposed to elicit happy feelings in you. But sometimes, even though we know this, we don’t feel ready to let go of them, despite how bad this relationship may make us feel. Or, perhaps, this difficulty in letting go comes from a moral point of view. For example, you may fear letting go of someone because you feel pressured morally to stay by their side, no matter how hard things get. Let me be clear on this: While supporting through hard times is appreciated, you don’t have any moral obligation to stand by someone who isn’t treating you right.
So, to better understand when it really is time to move on, here are 5 signs that show you it’s about time you do:
You Feel Constantly Undermined And Under Appreciated
Has it ever happened to you to be discussing something with someone and expressing your opinion, and the person who you’re talking to simply ignores it, or ignores you completely, or even verbally attacks you for speaking your mind? This is definitely a sign this relationship or friendship is not the best fit for you. Do you usually feel judged, misunderstood and accused, when something goes wrong?
A good relationship is one where someone’s shortcomings are taken as part of a learning process, regardless of what went wrong. If people around you are far more ready to point a finger at you, rather than give you a helping hand, it may be time to find a more supporting crew.
You Feel Stuck
There is a whole wide world out there, and so many things you can accomplish. You could be the next person to invent an awesome new tool that allows human beings to fly, a crazy new invention that will clear the world of crime and terror, you could be the person who finds a way to give a home and education to all the children in Africa. Perhaps these ideas may seem a little far off now, but they are completely possible.
However, when the closest people around us don’t believe it can be achieved, that we can’t do it and that there isn’t anything more to life than a safe job and some savings in the bank, it can stop us from going after the things we really do love and want to do.
The people who are closest to you should be a source of inspiration and provide you with the chance to learn more new and exciting things – they should never limit your growth and creativity. So, if you find yourself surrounded by people who do this exactly, it may be time to rethink the whole dynamics of the relationship. After all, would you really like to feel prevented from doing the things you want and love?
They Never Support The Things You Love
Do you constantly feel like, when you are in the room with the people you care about, few, if any, listen to you? How often do you get a sparkle in your eyes when you’re talking to them about the things you love? Do you get a chance to talk about these things?
Unless you don’t have any dreams or plans in your life, which I doubt, talking about what you want to accomplish, should make you feel on top of the world. Dreams and plans are the things to share with friends, families and lovers. I mean, if you don’t talk about the things you love most in your life, what would you talk about? Taxes and tasks yet to accomplish? Obligations and petty arguments? Should those really be the things to focus on in healthy relationships?
You Aren’t Growing
There isn’t such thing as living, if you’re not growing. You may survive, but are you living? Think about it. Do you think you’d be growing if you went to the same job every single day, took some vacation days off once a year to the same place and have the same exact routine almost every day for the rest of your life? Do you think you would be living? Well, no – you’d simply end up going through your whole life feeling exhausted!
Then, what makes you think it could be acceptable to allow your relationships to fall into the same trap? If these relationships aren’t allowing your mind to wander off to new, undiscovered paths, if they aren’t allowing you to grow and expand into the best person you can possibly become, then how are they allowing you to live?
You Feel As If They Won’t Play A Part In Your Future Plans
Sometimes, you really love the people in your life, and you’d like to keep the relationships you have with them forever, but, as time goes by, you start to understand the plans you used to have changed and now your lives are drifting apart. As much as we’d like to keep holding on to the people who’ve had a big impact on us, sometimes this does much more harm than good. The more you hold on to someone, the more you leave your path to walk theirs. You’d be deliberately leaving what you know is right for you, for something that no longer has a place in your life. I mean, if someone should continue to be in your life, they would, don’t you think? So, why put on so much effort?
Here, I am referring to the people who don’t seem to search for you anymore, yet that you continue to make a great deal of effort to relate to.
In your life, you will meet a lot of people, and I do mean a lot of people… Wouldn’t it make sense that, between so many, the only ones allowed to stay in our lives should be the ones who truly want to?
If you can relate to most of these, then there may have come the time for you to rethink some of your relationships, even if just to make some improvements. Do remember that you acquire attributes from the people closest to you, over time. So make sure you like who you are becoming.